


An Imbalance

by Noteventhat (Facialteeth)



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Blood and Injury, Brief Magic Less Magnus, Character Development, Gen, I don't know how to tag this god damn thing, Lack of Communication, Lorenzo is annoyed with Magnus, M/M, POV Multiple, magic bonding, magic sharing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-01
Updated: 2020-05-01
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:55:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,762
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23947291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Facialteeth/pseuds/Noteventhat
Summary: Lorenzo hadn't known why he'd felt so swayed in that moment to do something unthinkable but like Magnus' decision to give up his magic, Lorenzo could not take it back as much as he might want to.Instead of taking his magic away when Alec asks, Lorenzo bonds himself to Magnus Bane.
Relationships: Magnus Bane & Lorenzo Rey, Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood
Comments: 8
Kudos: 30





	An Imbalance

**Author's Note:**

> I posted an idea like this on tumblr a while ago [here](https://facialteeth.tumblr.com/post/184762295465/an-au-where-magnus-never-got-his-magic-back-and) and I finally got around to writing something about it.

When Magnus had first come to Lorezno asking for help getting his magic back, Lorenzo had thought it was ironic in a way. Magnus was one of the most powerful warlocks in their ranks, or so people said. He was _brilliant_ , truly a gem among their people. Yet, he’d come to Lorenzo powerless and with no place else to turn. 

It was ironic. It was also what Magnus deserved and Lorenzo truly didn’t mind helping, for the right price. He wasn’t unreasonable and if Magnus wanted to risk his life to have some of Lorezno’s power, so be it. 

No one was surprised when it hadn’t worked out. Warlocks exchanging magic like that hardly did. Your magic was your own and it was bound to work just as well as if you’d traded organs with someone, without checking blood types or compatibility or anything else. 

Without a tie to the original source your body would reject it and Lorenzo didn’t feel bad when it happened. Magnus had known the risks. He’d known very well, probably more than most, what he was doing when he’d asked. Lorenzo had even felt a little victorious when Alec had asked him to come take the magic from Magnus once again. 

He was getting what he deserved, nothing more and nothing less. Lorenzo had really felt that. So, why he’d done what he did… Lorenzo wasn't sure. He wasn’t even sure how it happened. He didn’t know why he’d felt so swayed in that moment to do something unthinkable but he’d done it and like Magnus’ decision to give up his magic, Lorenzo couldn’t take it back as much as he might want to.

Lorenzo had walked into the infirmary that day, ready to take his power back and ready to walk back out of that infernal building feeling _nothing_ but then, he’d had to stand by and watch them. That wasn’t something Lorenzo had been ready for. It wasn’t something he thought he’d have to see. 

It felt too intimate to watch, seeing Alec at Magnus’ bedside, clutching his hand tight as he murmured to him. It felt like he was seeing something he shouldn’t have, watching Magnus wake up and smile at the sight of Alec next to him, to see the pure relief on Alec’s face when Magnus was okay. 

It changed something. It wasn’t about _Magnus_. Lorenzo still didn’t like Magnus and he stood by that. Lorenzo still thought he was insufferable and rash and downright intolerable but for a moment, something in Lorenzo softened. 

It had been a long time since he’d loved anyone and it had been a long time, if ever, that someone had loved him as fiercely as Alec seemed to love Magnus Bane. It had nothing to do with Magnus but it had something to do with the love he compelled. It had something to do with Alec, who Lorenzo admired a great deal more than Magnus. It had something to do with how much he loved his intolerable partner.

Maybe, Lorenzo was being stupid. Maybe, he’d just felt weak for a moment but to see Magnus without all the makeup he normally wore, to see him lying in a hospital bed with Alec clutching his hand tight, to see Alec murmuring to him a moment before, praying he’d wake up- it made Lorenzo want to do something. It made that victorious feeling in Lorenzo’s chest fade away, until all that was left was a sick feeling of pity and dread.

For a moment, Lorenzo had wanted to help, just because he could. He hadn’t really thought through the consequences. He hadn’t really thought about how his life would change because of this. He hadn’t thought of anything, which became very obvious later. He just moved forward when he was supposed to and instead of pulling that power from Magnus’ chest, he’d pushed it in further.

Lorenzo hadn’t ever tried to share his life force with someone. He didn’t really know how it would feel or if he was doing it right but the next thing he knew, he was falling to the Institute’s cold floors and Alec was rushing to grab him, calling Magnus’ name all the while. 

Lorenzo woke up in a hospital bed with Catarina Loss at his side. It wasn’t a lover desperate for him to wake up but when Lorenzo opened his eyes, Catarina had been there to greet him. She’d sat back and stared at him for a few long moments before asking, “Why would you do that?” 

Her question wasn’t one of scorn or contempt, it was one of awe and Lorenzo found that he did not have an answer for her or for Magnus later when he asked with the exact same kind of breathless awe in his tone. 

Lorenzo had no clue what the hell he’d been thinking, nor did he really understand what he’d gotten himself into. Not until later that was, when it all became a problem. 

The first week being irreversibly bonded to Magnus Bane was… interesting to say the least. At first, Lorenzo had assumed they could both go on with their business as usual but it turns out, that wasn’t quite how it went. 

Being bonded to Magnus, Lorenzo’s magic felt stronger but it also felt like it was being stretched more thinly. Magnus’ magic was more powerful than Lorenzo’s and now that Lorenzo’s was connected to Magnus, his own magic was stronger than it ever had been. That would have been a wonderful unexpected perk to Lorenzo’s rash decision, except Magnus seemed determined to use every ounce of magic they had before Lorenzo could even start to do anything. 

Lorenzo tried to deal with it, for a little while. Magnus hadn’t had magic in weeks. Lorenzo thought he’d use it and then he’d calm down and he’d use it _less_. Of course, that wasn’t what happened. Lorenzo was bonded to Magnus Bane. He shouldn’t have thought Magnus would be so considerate. 

Lorenzo hadn’t spoken to Magnus since they’d left the Institute that day but he had Alec’s number and Alec was far less insufferable than the man he’d chosen to love, so Lorenzo texted him. 

As he hit send, Lorenzo felt another headache coming on, one he usually only got when he overexerted himself. Only this time, Lorenzo hadn’t even done anything yet and if Magnus had forgotten, he was the _High Warlock_ now. He had things to do.

Lorenzo poured himself a cup of coffee with his hands shaking and he contemplated what exactly had possessed him to do this to himself and if he was truly the stupidest man alive. 

Alec peered down at his phone screen, frowning at the text message that greeted him. Slowly, he stood from his desk and walked around the corner to find where his boyfriend had disappeared to. “Uh, Magnus?” Alec called as he slipped his phone into his pocket. 

“Alexander!” Magnus greeted him, like he hadn’t known Alec was right around the corner the whole time. Magnus spun in a wide circle as Alec entered the living room, his hands gesturing to the blue curtains, which this morning had been more of a maroon. “What do you think? Too dark?” 

Before Alec could speak, Magnus snapped his fingers and the curtains changed again, flickering in rapid succession between blue, tan and finally, a dull orange. “Too summery?” He asked as he turned back to look at them.

“Well, it’s summer…” Alec murmured, thinking about how fond he’d been of the original color. It looked nice in the living room but Alec didn’t know much about design either. 

Magnus spun with a smile. “You’re right.” He said, finally moving forward to greet Alec with a well received kiss. 

“Lorenzo texted me.” Alec said, after Magnus had already pulled away and spun again, probably to change the curtains to another color he wouldn’t like. 

“Oh?” Magnus asked, sounding half uninterested already. 

“Yeah.” Alec said, watching as Magnus did raise his hand yet again, changing the curtains back to the blue once before changing them to the red it had originally been. “He said you’ve been using all the magic. Uh, everyday.” 

Magnus turned to look at him, his expression instantly offended. “I have not been.” He insisted quickly, as if Alec had not just seen Magnus change the color of their curtains more times than he could count.

“No?” Alec questioned, glancing to the curtains and then back to Magnus. “So… you changing the color of the curtains wasn’t… using all the magic?” 

In front of him, Magnus scoffed, waving his hand dismissively at the curtains in question. “Of course not, that was hardly anything! That takes no magic at all!” 

Slowly, Alec nodded. “Okay…” He said shifting on his feet. Admittedly, Alec wasn’t quite sure what a lot of magic was but he also didn’t think Lorenzo was lying. “So, you haven’t used your magic for anything else this morning?” He questioned hesitantly.

At that, Magnus paused and pursed his lips. “Well-” Magnus frowned. Finally, he scoffed, his eyes rolling into the back of his head as he spoke. “Tell Lorenzo I’m done for the day.” He said, the aggravation showing through in his tone. 

Slowly, Alec nodded and after a moment he moved to pull his phone out to text Lorenzo back. Beside him, Magnus muttered under his breath, “He’s lucky my schedule is clear.” 

Alec knew that Magnus’ schedule had been clear for the past few days as well but he didn’t comment on that. Really, Magnus didn’t have much going on. He wasn’t the High Warlock anymore. He’d just gotten his magic back- or well, someone’s magic back. He didn’t have any clients banging at the door just yet, so Alec couldn’t really imagine what Magnus had been doing with all the magic he’d been using but the curtains seemed like a clear indicator.

Alec was thankful for what Lorenzo had done. Alec had never seen Magnus so broken or been so worried about him and Lorenzo had done what Alec could not and he’d fixed it. Even so, Alec could see the impending problem with their situation. 

Magnus was used to his own magic. He was used to using magic as freely as he breathed and now, he’d have to learn to share. Alec really wasn’t sure how that was going to work out. 

Magnus had Alec tell Lorenzo that he was done using magic for the day but in Magnus’ defense, he could not see the future. He had been _planning_ on taking it easy for the rest of the day and letting Lorenzo use their magic for whatever it was he was doing that was so important but Magnus also didn’t _plan_ on the demonic rift that someone opened downtown. 

Besides, Magnus wasn’t the High Warlock anymore. It wasn’t even his problem. He shouldn’t have even lifted a finger to try and stop it but he was such a good person, he thought he’d help Lorenzo out.

He also, perhaps, couldn’t watch his boyfriend and his parabatai run headfirst into a fight and not try to help, especially when there were a bunch of people around, right in the crossfire. Perhaps, Magnus couldn’t walk away and leave them in danger, even if it technically wasn’t his problem anymore. Magnus was also willing to admit that perhaps, he’d used their magic a little flippantly that morning. 

He rushed out onto the street directing any energy he had at the rift itself, while Alec and Jace tried to take care of the demons. They’d called backup but their backup seemed to be taking its sweet time getting there, so for the moment, Magnus had to take care of himself. There was no one to watch his back and that was unfortunate because the second Magnus raised his free hand to push back a demon who lunged for him, he realized that he did not have enough energy for this.

He was still getting used to Lorenzo’s magic anyway and on top of that, Magnus had used quite a lot of it that morning. Then later, Magnus had felt that whatever Lorenzo had done that had been particularly draining and now-

Magnus dropped his hold on the rift. He’d been trying to close it, weaken it, something but that wasn’t going to happen right now. Instead, Magnus turned, focusing his attention on the demons themselves. 

It wasn’t taking care of the problem. They were just going to keep coming through but if Magnus couldn’t close it, it was something. Until, he completely exhausted himself. The Shadowhunters would come to take care of the demons but they wouldn’t be able to close it and apparently, Lorenzo had better things to be doing. 

Magnus hadn’t tried to call him but he was sure someone had. He was the High Warlock for god's sake. He should have been the first person here and yet-

An arrow shot across the street, lodging itself into the heart of a demon Magnus had failed to see. Magnus had a split second to look over to Alec, who met his eyes with a wide, panicked look. It was a calm panic. It was a composed, stony kind of panic but panic nonetheless. 

Alec could see their problem as plainly as Magnus could. 

Magnus spun as another demon lunged for him. He handled this one himself as Alec turned back, just narrowly grabbing a mundane before her head was sliced off by a claw. The wave of magic it took Magnus to shove the demon back and explode it into an array of wet guts almost sent Magnus back on his ass. 

His head was spinning and every fiber of his being was yelling out for him to _stop_. He hadn’t used this much magic or been this weak in a very, very long time and yet, it was not a good time for him to collapse. It had been such a long time since Magnus had felt like this that he couldn’t even remember when it had happened last or why. Ragnor had come and saved him, he was pretty sure. 

But now, Ragnor was not here and even when the reinforcements Alec had called for finally arrived, it wasn’t much of a relief. Magnus fell back onto the sidewalk, letting himself sit as they took care of the demon’s he’d been struggling to stop. 

Alec was far enough away, battling two demons, that he didn’t notice Magnus but Jace was closer and when he saw Magnus sit, his eyes widened. He must look pretty bad then. 

“Are you-” 

Magnus waved his hand in Jace’s direction before he could even finish the sentence. “Fine.” He shot back and there wasn’t another moment for Jace to push it. A demon came at him and he spun suddenly, throwing himself back into the fight.

This was it then. No one else was coming and yet again, it rested on Magnus’ shoulders to save the day even though it _wasn’t his job anymore_. Magnus pushed his way to his feet, eyeing the rift with the caution of a dangerous creature. The rift would not lash out and attack him but it might as well have been able to. He couldn’t do this right now. 

Magnus moved to walk towards it, planning to do whatever he could with the abysmal amount of energy he felt left in his body but the world tilted as he did and Magnus found himself stumbling backwards, right into the hold of what he thought was a demon. 

The claws slashing through his chest never came and instead, Magnus turned his head and found himself far closer to Lorenzo Rey than he ever planned to be. Lorenzo looked winded and his eyes showed that he could feel just how little magic they were running on but he looked like he was in much better shape than Magnus. 

Cocky bastard. 

“What were you going to run us into the ground?” He snapped, though for a moment Magnus heard something teasing in Lorenzo’s tone, something that reminded him of Raphael or Catarina, something that reminded him of a friend being rightfully angry in the face of a dangerous situation. It reminded him of someone concerned.

Lorenzo Rey was not a friend of Magnus but for the second time in just a few weeks, it seemed he’d saved Magnus’ ass. Magnus steadied himself and managed to stand without tumbling over again. “Well, if you hadn’t decided to show up-” 

Magnus let his sentence go unfinished, the shriek of demon tumbling through the rift drawing his attention away. Magnus felt far better than he had a few moments ago. He could feel the energy draining from Lorenzo into his body, balancing them both out.

He knew they were bonded and it made sense that they were more powerful together but still, it came a little bit of a surprise to Magnus that he was more powerful with the help of someone else. That was just another thing that was new about this whole situation. It was a relief here but the petty part of Magnus’ brain found it a little infuriating nonetheless. He didn’t want to need anyone else ever. 

Magnus eyes skimmed for a moment. Alec was diving out the way of another demon as one of the reinforcements dove to deliver the final blow to the demon’s head. Jace was laughing as he spun to slash at another behind them, yelling something over to Alec that was aggravating enough to make him roll his eyes even as they kept darting around them, alert. 

There was a scratch across Alec’s cheek. It looked like a claw had caught Jace’s arm. A few of the new arrivals were banged up as well but overall, it looked like everyone was okay. Magnus took in a breath and then turned to Lorenzo.

“You ever closed a rift?” Magnus called over. 

Lorenzo pressed his lips for a moment and Magnus knew before he could speak the words that the answer was no. Magnus wasn’t exactly surprised. Why would Lorenzo Rey have closed a rift before? Magnus had always been around, closing them when they’d pop open. 

“It’s easy.” Magnus promised loudly. “Just don’t pass out.” Magnus met his eyes seriously and forced a tight smile. “I won’t be able to hold it, if you pass out.” He emphasized. 

Lorenzo looked at him annoyed but they didn’t really have time to argue which of them was more likely to pass out (if Magnus had time, he’d have argued that he’d closed a lot of rifts in his life and he was also far more used to being drained of magic than he imagined _Lorenzo Rey_ was especially since Lorenzo had thrown a hissy fit that morning when he’d hardly even used any magic at all). 

Lorenzo nodded without comment and together, they headed forward towards the rift. Magnus moved first and Lorenzo seemed a little relieved that he had. It struck Magnus suddenly that Lorenzo was nervous. 

This situation was new to them both but there was more new here to Lorenzo than Magnus. This was Magnus’ life. He was always throwing himself into danger and trying to fix problems, even if it took the last of what he had to offer. Magnus didn’t feel like Lorenzo was used to helping anyone with anything and for a moment, Magnus wondered exactly what had changed to make him do so.

Magnus still didn’t understand why Lorenzo had bonded to him. As selfless as he tried to be, he didn’t think he would have done it in return, not for Lorenzo. Magnus looked to the rift, reminded suddenly of what they were doing by a sharp human shriek somewhere from behind him. 

It hadn’t sounded like Alec or Jace, so Magnus didn’t spare a glance. He’d try to help whoever it was after, if he could. He couldn’t do two things at once. 

Magnus met Lorenzo’s eyes and then raised his hands towards the rift and threw more power at it than he’d been able to when he’d last tried, alone. He’d told Lorenzo not to pass out because he wouldn’t be able to hold it but more realistically, he’d be crushed by it, like a rubber band snapping and ricocheting back on him. If Lorenzo let go, Magnus would be struck.

Somewhere beside him, Lorenzo raised his hands to do the same thing Magnus was.

Magnus tried not to think about how much faith he was putting in Lorenzo and at the same time, he tried not to think about the fact that their magic was the same color and he’d already put all of the faith he had in him.

For a moment, Magnus had thought he’d been worried for nothing. With both of them trying to do it, the rift was closing like it had never put up a fight in the first place. Magnus had been annoyed for a moment that it was closing so easy because Lorenzo was going to think it had been this easy when Magnus had tried alone. 

There’s nothing wrong with needing help, Magnus told himself in his head, echoing words Alec had said to him like it would make him feel better. It didn’t. 

The rift had been just about closed, the demons around them mostly contained by the reinforcements that had showed up, when one last demon came spiraling from the opening, shooting itself towards Magnus like it had the intelligence to decide to do so. 

Magnus _should_ have stepped aside and let the demon shoot past him to anyone one of the shadowhunters who would have handled it quickly but he didn’t. Instead, Magnus stood there like a brick and stared at the demon barreled towards his head. 

He was tired. He was staying on his feet with some force he didn’t know he had in him. He just didn’t comprehend what was happening. He didn’t move and before Magnus could even realize he should, Lorenzo moved for him.

The rift flicked shut just before Lorenzo let go but Magnus was still holding it. The magic shot back and as it hit him, Magnus felt like every fiber in his body was being ripped apart. A moment later, Lorenzo hit him and together, they tumbled to the ground in a mess of gravel, elbows and blood. 

The demon shot past them. Magnus was sure one of the shadowhunters managed to get it but he didn’t turn to look. For a moment, Magnus thought he was going to be the one to pass out after all but after a moment, the feeling subsided and all that was left was pain and the feeling of sand in his teeth.

When Magnus finally managed to open his eyes, he was blinded by the sun which looked like it was spinning in the sky, even though Magnus knew it was still. Magnus rolled over after a moment and he heaved into the dirt under him before he managed to pull himself up onto his knees. 

Magnus could feel blood on his face. It was covering his hands. His glamour was down and he didn't even try to lift it again. He knew he did not have the energy for something as trivial as that. Standing might not even be on the table currently. 

Magnus had been about to speak to Lorenzo: he was going to say thank you for shoving him. He was going to say he knew Lorenzo would be the one to let go. When Magnus turned to look at him though, he found he couldn’t say anything because Lorenzo himself was not awake anymore. 

Magnus reached out and touched him, jabbed him really. He was okay. He’d just passed out and the sight came as a relief. Magnus didn’t have to thank someone who was unconscious and besides, Lorenzo had saved him enough times this week.

Magnus’ repayment would be not leaving him in the dirt. He irreversibly bonded himself to Magnus, he risked himself by shoving Magnus out of the way of a demon… Magnus was pretty sure that not leaving him unconscious on the ground would make them even. 

They both slept for almost twenty four hours, while Alec fretted around the kitchen, waiting anxiously for someone to wake up and assure him that they were fine. Caterina had come instantly. She’d said they were both just far too drained and they needed to sleep it off. She said they were okay.

Alec trusted her but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t like to hear the words from Magnus, or even Lorenzo. They were bonded now. Lorenzo would know if Magnus was okay and that was an odd thing.

Alec himself was bonded to someone. He imagined he understood what their bond meant more than most but he and Jace, they were a team. They worked together. They knew how to function as one. They knew what was too much for themselves and they knew when to stop.

Magnus and Lorenzo were not a team. Alec didn’t have any ill will towards Lorenzo, he couldn’t given what Lorenzo had done for Magnus, but they still had ill will for each other. Lorenzo did not like Magnus. Magnus did not like him. 

Alec couldn’t imagine being bonded to someone you didn’t get along with. He and Jace had fought a couple of times but not like Lorenzo and Magnus. They had never fought without that baseline of knowing that they cared for each other above all else. 

Alec imagined it was scary to have to trust someone you didn’t even like with your wellbeing and once again, Alec found himself wondering why Lorenzo had done it at all. The incident with the rift had only shown how serious this was. They could kill each other, if they didn’t find some balance between them.

Alec was scared there wasn’t any balance to be found. 

Magnus woke up a couple of hours later. Lorenzo, as if sensing he was awake, woke up shortly after. Neither of them look quite whole yet but they were awake and they were okay. That was the important part. 

Alec had been hoping they’d talk but Lorenzo said he’d rather rest at his home. Alec tried to get him to drink some coffee and have something to eat before he left but he insisted that he was fine. Magnus didn’t say much of anything to Lorenzo and Lorenzo didn’t seem to want to say much of anything to him. 

He left and when the door closed, Alec had sighed. He wasn’t going to push. Magnus had to deal with it on his own but… Alec also thought that perhaps, he could deal with it and throw a thank you in there. 

Alec did not say this but later, he came up behind Magnus and he saw him texting someone. Alec couldn’t read what he was saying but he could see that it was to Lorenzo and he also see that Magnus was typing quite a bit and then rethinking it, backtracking and typing it all again. 

Alec left him alone. Whatever he was saying, it was far more than he’d said to Lorenzo before and it was a start. Maybe, just maybe, they could get to a place where they wouldn’t annoy each other to death. Maybe, they’d get to a place where Lorenzo could text Magnus when he had a problem, instead of texting him.

That might be a little optimistic but Alec had hope. Deep down, Alec didn’t think Lorenzo and Magnus were much different from each other. Putting yourself in the line of fire to save someone else was a Magnus Bane type of move. Sharing your magic with someone was also something he could see his lover doing. 

Perhaps, they couldn’t see it but they were more alike than they thought and at the end of the day, maybe that’s all the baseline they needed to try and make this work. 

A calendar too. Alec also thought that he should get a calendar to try and keep track of their big magic using events. Maybe, they could come up with a schedule of who could do what and when, sparing any rifts that decided to open up in the city… but Alec would mention the calendar idea later.

Hopefully, the next few days could be empty for them both and just maybe, that would give them some time to talk.


End file.
